“Call me insane but I thought that dating Gerry is the only chance I could have to be with my bestfriend again…”
*Sighs*
I’ve fallen into one of Gerry’s tricks again. Here I am, sitting at Coffee Indulgence sipping my cold coffee as I pretend to listen to his stories. Kanina pa kwento nang kwento ang isang ito. Halos kilala ko na yata nang husto ang ex niya sa kakakwento niya. TSK!
Maybe this is what I get for also using him to be with my bestfriend, Z. I thought they’re together kaya eto naman ako, punta agad. Yun pala, I’m stuck with the boring company of this person who chats with me as though we are always on a debate.
Naku, kalahati na pala ang coffee ko. I gotta do something before he rewinds his stories again.
“Um… Gerry, kamusta na nga pala si Z?”
“Ha? Ok naman siya.”
“Mukhang masyado siyang busy. Wala akong balita sa kanya.”
“Hindi naman. Ganun lang talaga siguro pag may love life.”
“Ha? Anong love life?”
“Hindi mo ba alam?”
“Ang alin?”
“May girlfriend na siya”
***
It’s already late in the evening but I feel as though time has stood still from the moment I heard that Z already got a girlfriend. I can still recall my shock when I heard Gerry. Every thing around me has lost its colors and it’s as if I am in a black and white film. I was in total blank. In fact, di ko nga maalala kung paano natapos ang “date” namin na yun ni Gerry at kung papaano ako nakauwi.
I feel so shattered. My last tiny flickering light of hope was gone. And so I sunk on my bed and just tried to recall our good days together. I looked for old letters, photos and gifts. Then I saw ones from my debut. Our photos on that occasion and a poem I wrote after…
Lamentations
“.I’ll have savored you like an oyster
memorized you
held you under my tongue
learned you by heart
So that when you leave
I’ll write poems”
-Sandra Cisneros
I hold in my hands
memories of yesterday
Dried, fragile petals
on decaying stems
red and white roses
Now turned yellowish-brown
Beauty that has fade
Can never be regained
Sweet tunes and lovely roses
A night of dreams
You belong to me that evening
Like Endymion in Selene’s arms
A slave of her love
Just for a night
If only I could stop the earth
From revolving
If only I could freeze the time
It could have been
Only you and me
And the night won’t come to an end
But like the roses in my hands
The night is now a memory
That will fade
And will be taken away by time
I can never bring back the magic
For now,
The spell
Is
Over.
Reality
Has
Come
We
Are
Just
friends.
Yes, we are just friends… Then, my mind suddenly snapped back into reality. Yes, there is definitely no point in seeing Gerry anymore I should already get rid of him (way back ago). After all, he is still so into his ex, getting rid of him will do us both a huge favor.
To be continued…
a bittersweet irony.